Running the Other Direction

Have you ever wanted to run away? Surely you have thought about, it could be so easy, just pack a suitcase, withdrawal all your cash and run the opposite direction of your home. Few do this; it takes serious bravery to leave everything behind and start fresh in a new land.

Lately, I have been wanting to run away, or at least do something different. I feel kind of trapped; I am trapped in a house with people that are constantly fighting with me, trapped in student debt, in relationships that wont end, and relationships that ended abruptly, leaving that stinging feeling.

Run until you cannot breath, run until you are finally free

Everything that happens takes a piece from you, and that piece runs away, never to be seen or heard from again. Well, if something that could be so important in your life can so easily run in the other direction, well then what cant I do the same? Fear, I suppose... grounds me here... I need a push!

I have been thinking a lot lately about what the next chapter of my life will be, especially in terms of my education. I was leaning towards a career in law, I have been leaning that way for a few years now. Suddenly, I am asking myself, "why would I ever want to do that?" That would basically mean selling out... going against everything I have tried to break away from. Law is a great profession, but I just feel like it would be a career that would tarnish my spirit and suck the life out of me. Everyone joins law for the same things... to make a change... or to make money; the ladder I believe usually ends up overshadowing the former. I could be wrong... it's just an opinion.

The other option I have is to get into a great graduate program, or meet a mentor that can guide me in the right direction. It would be amazing to improve my writing, and absorb everything I can from someone who has experience in the profession. So now what do I do this summer? Do I study my butt off for the Lsat, or read some great literature.. maybe both just in case.

Running away isn't really an option, and honestly the baggage always follows. It is always there in the back of your mind, leaving that tight anxious feeling in your chest when you accidently let it surface. I have that feeling a lot, and I really don't know how to rid myself of my baggage. Running away might seem like the easy way out, but it is weak. It is harder to muster the courage to actually fix them, if there is a way to do so.

Today, I am figuratively running away; one day of running away isn't so bad, is it? I am taking the time to forget all my problems, and just live. Today is just live day, so everyone say "*uck it."